Father's Day Isn't Happy For Everyone

Days like this are hard when you have a parent who has passed away, I haven't bought a power tool, necktie, short/polo combination, card, or taken my father to dinner in 7 years.

It's funny the things you miss.

It was only last Father's Day that I brought myself to delete his number from my phonebook; the reality that I would never get a call during the game from him again finally set in. My father was my best friend, I used to think that was a great thing, but here we are 7 years later and he still hasn't been replaced.

William Reid Jr was a great man (notice I didn't say perfect). He embodied the soldier's creed. His love for God, his family, and his country drove nearly all the choices he made in his adult life.

As I reminisce, I can't help but smile because that's what my Father did more than anything; it's what most people remember him for. I haven't met a person who knew my father who hasn't had a funny story to tell about him. No question as to where I got my sense of humor from.

He was the strongest man I ever known. I have witnessed him defy the odds and survive and recover from 3 strokes, extreme hypoglycemia (his blood sugar so high the Doctors couldn't believe how he staved off a coma let alone death), Hodgkin's lymphoma, chemotherapy, the massive brain tumor that developed after the chemo stopped and daily radiation it took to shrink it, only to succumb to sepsis from an infection that developed when the wound in his stomach wasn't properly cared for after his dementia lead him to pull the feeding tube they placed in his stomach out.

I guess we really only get 9 lives...

My dad was a man who never stopped believing in Redemption. "No relationship based in love could ever be damaged beyond repair" is what he said to me when I was in the midst of a quarrel with one of my siblings that lasted for nearly a year. He orchestrated our reconciliation.

"Do what's right" has to be the best advice he ever gave me; even though I still struggle to follow it.

"Your breast got lost in the mail" has to be the funniest thing he has ever said to me. What a way to explain flat-chestedness to your 14 year old daughter. (Anyone else detect foreshadow here besides me?)

"You ain't fooling nobody, be yourself" were the last instructions he gave me, that February morning while I was feeding him his breakfast. Letting me know that he knew I was gay (no matter how I tried to hide and deny) and giving me the courage to live a life outside of the shadows.

"I love you" the last words I said to him, on Monday, February 24th at approximately 11:30 in Pitt Memorial Hospital, a little more than 7 years ago.

His absence in my life mean my children have to grow up without their Grandfather; my youngest is too young to remember any of the memories he created with him. I think that saddens me more than anything else.

Today I honor my Father by praying for those Fathers and Grandfathers who have CHOSEN to be absent in their children's lives and for those who have severed relationships due to circumstances. My prayer is they find themselves on the road to Redemption before they leave this dimension.

I salute you Dad; your love for me has transcended the grave.

RIP SSG William Reid, Jr you will forever be loved and missed.

For you people who have your Fathers here, honor them, and take time to think about those who have to spend the day absent from their Fathers for whatever reason.

Hate It or Love It; Either Way You Felt Somethin'