Those Were the Days - Ode to Edith

(Sings to the All in the Family theme song)

Boy the way Mike Jackson played

Songs that made the hit parade 

Bois like us we had it made

Those were the days

And you knew where you were then

Men supported their families then

Mister we could use a man like 

Bill Clinton again

Still growing our welfare state 

Our kids we fail to educate

Man my old Honda ran great 

Those were the days

Equal Rights Under the Law

I tried to be silent on this issue, but people wont let me rest; so as your resident gay, Im gonna answer this inboxed question for the group...

Here are my thoughts on the Civil Rights issue (yes I said Civil rights) that is currently being argued before the Supreme Court: 

1.  This is America, where we all have the right to Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness; all means all, not just Christian Anglo-Saxons.

2.  People love to point to the Bible and say that God invented marriage.  Please show me the scripture where God defines marriage; go ahead, Ill wait...God didnt define marriage, people defined marriage; God honors the commitment.  Besides, initially, God's chosen people were polygamous; I wonder if God ordained that.

3.  This is a Civil Rights issue because I am clearly being discriminated against purely because Im a woman who loves a woman.  She should have the right to be by my side in my weakest moments, should I be hospitalized, and she should have the right to inherit any assets I leave behind should I die...that fact that she doesnt is totally ridiculous!!! 

4.  Being Black and being Gay arent the same thing; however as a Black Lesbian, I can honestly say that I have been discriminated against far more for being Gay than I have for being Black.  While I didnt grow up in a time where I was barred from places for my skin color, I do live in a time where I am looked at like I just landed from outer space, like I dont belong, like Im an abomination, every time I make an appearance in a Ladies room or a church; Im not saying the two are the same, but they are damn sure related. 

5.  People feel my sons are permanently being scarred because they are being raised by two women.  I happen to feel that my sons are some of the most well adjusted, well mannered, intelligent, articulate, young black men on the planet.  I know for a fact that no one can teach them more about how to love a woman than me; disagree, leave your lady with me for 2 minutes...

#GeekThoughts

Should Auld Acquaintance Be Forgot

Should auld acquaintance be forgot, and never brought to mind?

I get it, I finally get it. This song is about clean slates. I get it. Maybe it took 36 birthdays before I could understand. As I embark on this phase of my journey I realize that at heart Im still the 16 year old version of myself, plus a gray patch in my hair and a wealth of life's experiences. Im still that overachieving student, who loves to learn things for the sake of learning, that 4.0 on my transcript felt really good last semester #DeansListGeek. Im still watching Jeopardy every night training for the day I make my debut on the show, except now Im finding myself getting more and more right (Ive got to put these boys through college somehow). I still love to read, and rereading these classics as an adult has totally blown my mind. I still love writing poems and making music. I still love to sing around my house and reluctant to do it anywhere else, even thought Id probably be pretty good. I still love to draw pictures but now I do them with my camera instead of my pencil on the pages of my Bible and my text books. I still laugh and hang out with the two boys running through my house, except instead of it being my brothers, it's my clones. My future is still wide open, and my list of goals and achievements is still just as long.

Difference is now Ive learned to take life as it comes. To maximize every opportunity. To enjoy the journey. To worry less about things I cant control. To trust God and be honest with him. To believe in myself and my abilities. I've learned that I dont know everything and that everybody has something to teach me. I've learned that dreams can come true, and that my sons really can grow up to be President. Ive learned that it's my responsibility to lead them by example, carrying them as far up the economic ladder on my back as I can to give them a higher platform to start on than I had. Ive learned that honesty is freeing but lonely (people with hurt feelings tend to stay away); the ones who truly love you always find their way back. Ive learned that the Mayans were smarter than most believe and those who were paying attention know that while the world was watching for something awesome to happen from the sky, the real action was happening in the back door. Ive learned that life is my gift of entertainment to my Creator, I know that anytime he tunes in to my channel he is thoroughly being entertained.

That being said I have even less time for bullshit. I dont have any money to loan, Im nation building here at home. If your influence in my life isnt positive please know you are soooooooo last year!

Happy Birthday to Me! May this be the beginning of my best year yet!

Should auld acquaintance be forgot, and never brought to mind?

Why not, it's a new year!

...Hate It or Love It; Either Way You Felt Somethin'

For Grandma Matt

There will never be another like you
Sassiest Lady I've ever known
Never left the house unless she was "Lookin' like sumthin'"
Daughter, Friend, Wife, Mother, Grandmother, Great-Grandma, Great-Great Grandma
Mrs. Mattie Lee Jones, you lived a full life
It was in this building, huddled around a heater with my 20 cousins
I learned my first memory verse; our first Sunday School teacher
We knew it was time for church when we heard you singing
"It's so good to be in here" but is it good to be here today?
The selfish part of me wants to say no
Who will I watch Matlock with?
Who's going to be the Mayor of Myrtle Avenue?
But I know you were ready
I was a Grandchild even before my father became your son-in-law
I always felt like one of your favorites
We all did
Thank you for showing me that you NEVER close the door on your family
Thank you for those rides to school no matter how many days in a row I missed the bus
I'm now immune to whiplash
Thanks for those fishing trips to Whichard's Beach and vacations to White Lake
It's because of you I no longer have rollers on my butt
Only person who could lick dishes clean faster than I could wash 'em
Sorry for the times I touched your wigs, and your pistol, when you sent me to fetch something from your dresser
Thanks for the year you helped raise my son, can't call what you did daycare
He's such an old man because of his time with you
Four months ago I asked you what the first thing Granddaddy Cecil said when you guys first met
You smiled and said "Hey Sweet Thang"
I know those were his words when you guys met again
I'm envious of the love you two shared
I'm proud of you and the life you lived
I love you; I know you're resting

Auld Lang Syne

So my 18 is 18 and it feels great. For the first time in years I've had back-to-back years of positive emotional progress, even though it book ended a plethora self-inflicted digressions. I truly love my life. I love my Lady and my Clones, and am eternally grateful for the unconditional love and support they give me...wait is this the same ole' Charlie Brown?

Yerp! It sure i--well...ACTUALLY it's not(in my best Dion voice)! This is the new and improved me. The semi-mature me, the self-confident me (well I've always been that me), the me with healthy love in my life, the entrepreneurial me! I'm seeing the potential future in my life get a few additional optional endings right before my eyes.

If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster, and treat those two impostors just the same...Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,and—which is more—you’ll be a Man, my son - Rudyard Kipling

This has been recurring theme in my thirties (one at which I struggle with tremendously being a Bi-polar Aquarius), brought to my attention by my Dear Ole'Uncle Alvin, drilled to the core by Phi Alpha Nu (kinda missed the cut on that one...dern narcissism), and one that I am slowly getting closer to mastering; and by mastering I mean getting a good ole' American "C".

Thirty-five has taught me how to love and be loved. To give of myself in ways I never knew possible. That fidelity in my relationship could be more than just a dream. That the love I show my loved ones may never be reciprocated. That mind over matter is a valid principle. That dreams are still worth having. That I am still pretty damn intelligent. That I am severely under paid. That my children are listening. That it's now or never.

With that being said, I don't have time for the bullshit I used to have time for. I'm busy working on my future and family's future. If your influence in my life isn't positive please know you are soooooo last year!

Happy Birthday Me!

Should auld acquaintance be forgot, and never brought to mind?

HELL YEAH! F- 'em!

...Hate It or Love It; Either Way You Felt Somethin'

Dear Newt Gingrich

Dear Newt Gingrich,

First I want to let you know who I am. I am a College Educated, Black Republican who voted for George W twice proudly. I am a lover of all things free enterprise and I want the Government to stay out my life, most notably my bedroom. After having watched you in last week's South Carolina debates I have a few issues I want to raise with you.

The first being, in 1998 when you were Speaker of the House, you LED the Impeachment against President Bill Clinton for having an affair with one of his employees. We now know that you, in fact, were doing the EXACT same thing with your current wife, Callista; that is, having an affair with one of your employees. Shouldn't you be called to the carpet on your hypocrisy, Sir? You are running for the White House as a champion for Family Values, when you have cheated on two of your three wives, and after hearing how "Callista doesn't care what you do", we may know why you haven't cheated on her. My point is this, you want the right to make sure that I can not marry my Girlfriend because I am a Woman, it is morally wrong, and destructive to the structure of the family unit. Isn't Adultery also morally wrong and destructive to the family unit? Neither the "blood sucking News Media", nor your Republican peers have demanded an answer for your hypocrisy.

The second issue I have with you and your campaign is this; your political views and policies seem to be extremely anti-Black and it appears that they may be based in racism. Again, while Speaker of the House, you constructed the Personal Responsibility and Work Opportunity Act, much of which I agreed with and supported. I agree that Welfare should be a roadway to employment. Some of your statements are have factual merit and can not be argued, I actually agree with some of the things you say. I too feel Black people demand paychecks instead of food stamps. However, I continue to find some of the generalizations you make about Blacks to be filled with racial undertones, and it only serves to remind me that you grew up in the Segregated South. Saying Black people have low work ethic is racist. Saying that Black people want a hand out is racist. Are there generations of Black people who have been satisfied with living off of public entitlement programs, YES! Is it because they all have low work ethic and want handouts, NO! Is it because they are severely under-educated and under-employed, YES!!

Every other ethnic group of Americans came to this county because they wanted a better life; my people were forced to immigrate, going from freedom to property in the blink of an eye. There are millions of Blacks who have felonies on their records just because their drug of choice to use or sell was crystallized, not powered cocaine. I am only THREE generations from slavery, (a statement my President could never make, his father was African) and miles away from ethnic equality. I am working hard to take my sons one step closer to the American Dream than I was. It is statements like the ones you continue to make that make me feel racism won't die until the ones who grew up supporting it d--let me stop right there before I make a racist generalization. It is clear to me that American policies reflect the racists views of those in leadership.

I hope that you in fact do win the Republican nomination so that President Obama can check you on your bullshit, you can't trump him on family values. I will be at the edge of my seat watching a debate between you and President Obama. I can't wait to see you two go at it, it's going to make for some great sound bytes. You are the best Republican in the race, but I think the bi-racial Obama has a better vision for the country. I will vote for you to be the Republican nominee on Super Tuesday, but I won't vote for you in November; not because you're a hypocrite but because you're racist.

...Hate it or Love it; Either Way You Felt Somethin'

The End of HIV

My Generation is the first to have grown up with HIV. When I was 5 years old in 1981, the first person was diagnosed with the virus called Human immunodeficiency virus or HIV. There are many rumors about the origin of this virus and it's eventually cryptic domination it has held on several ethnic and social communities, but there is no doubt that the HIV virus has taken 30 million lives worldwide to date. That's a MASSIVE amount of people. In honor of World AIDS Day I wanted to do my part to raise awareness among my peers, Blacks and Homosexuals.

We are a nation of 308 million. 224 million are White. 50 million Hispanic. 39 million are Black. 9 million are Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual or Transgender. 1.2 million are living with HIV Caused Diseases.

HIV has plagued the globe for 30 years. This epidemic touches lives on all continents and it permeates all communities. (Red I used permeate for you.) However, the end is in sight. 2010 may have been the year of turning points in the realm of HIV. It is the year that scientists revealed there were segments of the population genetically immune to HIV, is the first year that the global number of new infections did not increase, and it is also the year that an infected patient with leukemia was given a bone marrow transplant and now lives HIV-free...Yeah Yeah I know...great news right? But don't go flinging your condoms off in celebration just yet.

According to the Center of Disease Control and Prevention last year roughly 56 thousand new people were infected with HIV just last year. That is a equal to the population of Greenville, NC. Insane right? HIV is growing at an exponential rate in the Black community. In 2009 44% of all new infections were Black. Black Men who have Sex with Men (MSM) accounted for 73% of those NEW cases. The remaining 30% were women who contracted HIV through Heterosexual sex. Yeah you just read that...HETEROSEXUAL sex. That confirms some of those MSNs haven't been totally open with their Female partners about their sex lives, but what else is new? I pray for people who are in the closet sexually, however I have nothing but contempt for "Down Low Brothers". Their cloaked lifestyle is killing our community, but I'm going to stop before I go of on another tangent...this editorial is about HIV.

The HIV virus is highly concentrated in blood, vaginal fluids, and semen. Unprotected sex and infected needles account for the majority of virus transfer, but we all know there are random unfortunate exceptions. Knowing your status is 90% of the battle. I know that I am HIV-negative because I was last tested in 2010. I remember the very first time I was admitted for an MS exacerbation the Nurse being shocked because I was eager (and relieved) to find out I was still negative. Lesbians can contract HIV if performing cunnilingus on an infected female during the time surrounding her menstruation (pre, during, and post). We all need to wrap it up, grab those condoms and dental dams and protect yourselves.

It is important to KNOW YOUR STATUS. I can't reiterate that enough. Know your status! I still hear that nurse's surprise echoing in my head, "I've NEVER had any one ask before." NEVER? Well I'm glad I was her first, and I hope I wasn't her last. I'm even more thankful that I'm Negative, I don't think my revolting T-cells could handle that too. If you don't know your status, get tested! There is help for you if you are positive. There is life after HIV. There is actual hope for a cure. Maybe not in my lifetime but in the future. Maybe one day we will actually see the end of the HIV.

...Hate It or Love It; Either Way You Felt Something